Have Elevator, Will Elevate (the Teaching Profession)

How making teaching a career no one wants will finally make our kids college and career ready…

elevatorThe year was 2014 and, alas, all was not right with the world. Income inequality in these United States had both soared and skyrocketed to levels not seen since the 1920’s, and the middle class was living just a little less large. Some pointed to the collapse of labor unions as part of the problem, but that explanation seemed too obvious. Then another, far more intriguing explanation began to gain currency, particularly among those who possessed a great deal of currency. The blame for the country’s slide lay with teachers who, coincidentally, happened to belong to one of the country’s few remaining unions. Could there be a connection?

Yacht_CaptainA rising tide lifts all yachts (and elevates the teaching profession)
Fortunately, an easy solution lay within reach: the teaching profession needed to be elevated out of the reach of those who were currently in it. ¿But who was bold and disruptive enough to orchestrate such a boldly disruptive plan? Once again, we were in luck—although by *we,* I am not referring to you. While the rising tide of inequality had lifted but a few yachts, as immense fortune would have it, those yachts were captained by individuals who dreamed of *elevating the teaching profession* from its current malaise of low expectations up towards the very penthouse of career status.

A chauffeured trip down memory lane
But how to make sure that these new, super-charged teaching elevators reached the  floor marked *E* for excellence? Of course, Finland offered one path to the top, but its lessons, like avoiding standardized testing and not having a lot of poor people, seemed like the wrong ones. chauffeur 2Might the answer to the question so many were asking lay in the past, back in teaching’s golden age, before the teacher unions had spannered up the college and career readiness works? It was time for a chauffeured trip down memory lane… Long, long ago in the not-so-distant past, teaching was what was known colloquially as a *crap job.* Members of the overwhelmingly female workforce were low paid and could be fired for any reason, like being pregnant, or because they got up in the grills of their administrators, a great many of whom seemed not to be geniuses. 

Leads to an obvious conclusion
Thanks to the collective action of a great many teachers it was no longer possible for them to be fired just because an administrator had a friend or relative who had always wanted to go into teaching. But then, tragedy struck. Due to a process (due process?) that no one could ever quite explain, the fact that teachers could no longer be fired for any reason caused expectations to sink and test scores to plummet, except where they rose to great global heights. Meanwhile, those states where teachers retained the right to work free of such rights, like South Carolina, North Carolina and Texas, soon became the envy of the test-taking world, an honor that that remains theirs today.

union maid 2And an even more obvious two-part solution
Fortunately an even more obvious two-part solution lay even closer at hand. Part one: mail informational packets to low-income students at home (if, in fact, they still had one of these), informing them that selective colleges represented their best shot of entering the increasingly selective middle class. Step two: create new openings in the middle class by making a formerly middle class profession less, well, middle classy by doing this, this, this, this or, if one dared, this. The logic was as simple as it was elegant: the best way to make students college and career ready was to make teaching a career that no one wanted. Only one question remained: why had no one thought of this before?

Career readier
Meanwhile, there were already signs a plenty that the boldly audacious plan was already paying off. In North Carolina, where the teaching profession now ranked among the most elevated in the nation, career readiness rates were soaring—especially among teachers who were leaving teaching for other careers. Best of all, college ready students were increasingly demonstrating their own lack of interest in pursuing teaching as a career by not pursuing teaching as a career. At last estimate, freshman enrollment in the state universities’ education schools was estimated to be down between 20 and 40 percent. 

Send tips and comments to tips@haveyouheardblog.com. Follow Jennifer on Twitter @EduShyster.

 

Share on Facebook0Tweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+0Print this pageEmail this to someone

2 Comments

  1. Well, they’ve got a long way to go to make teaching unattractive, at least in our common home state of MA. Take it from a guy with an 8-12 English teaching license that can’t even get an interview, much less a job. There were 200 applications for one position recently…I *sub* there, and couldn’t get an interview!
    I’m 49 years old. I went back to school for this, because it’s what I *really* want to do. I’m regretting that decision. And, honestly, if you’re on the outside looking in, banging your head at a solid brick wall, you have little if no tolerance for the whining. I can’t even get an interview at a *charter*, even though they’ll get me for entry-level wages and get my life experience for free. The schools that want new, cheap teachers are a myth, at least in MA. They all want master’s degrees and experience.
    So, yeah, if teaching has become soooooo onerous for you? Good. Get the hell out of my way. I will gladly take it.

  2. Teachers careers were destroyed here in Chicago, despite Excellent or Superior ratings for older workers (50-55 years of age). Some were older, but this nationwide lying and purging of veteran teachers absolves these states from paying larger pensions. Pension reform legislation is being pushed by inbreeders or people who listen to or were taught by inbreeders. Do some research on inbreeding. Genetic physical, intellectual, sexual, and emotional problems abound among elected and appointed authority. Other than sociopathy, one cannot explain away or justify policies that are destroying teachers reputations based on lies.

    No prosecution of murderers, liars, and thieves like the bushitter, condoleezza lice et.al. from omurderer is proof that the aforementioned and their ilk are lying, thieving, and murdering sociopaths. My women and I got raped out of our jobs, along with thousands of other educators by chicago public schools. Private sector workers got raped out of their jobs and homes by this fucked-up system. The skanksters, whoreporations and wall street got bailed out for their thieving rape of the people.

    One can serve this country and get raped or not serve this country and get raped. Rest assured, you will be raped. I am one of the Marines who were stationed at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina. This base’s groundwater was contaminated with Trichloroethylene, a known carcinogen, for some 34 years, There is little one can do except wait for the inevitable diagnosis of one of 15 types of cancers related to that contaminated groundwater.

    And please don’t lecture me or anyone else on politeness, delicacy, or decency toward house slaves, regardless of ethnicity or culture, who agrees with these putrid reforms. To hell with them and whomever taught them. As long as one has truth on their side, say or do whatever you want, as long as get attacked first.

    Whomever pushes theses deforms in Illinois, be they educational or pension, had better pray to their invisible man, that I do not see them in any trouble. I’m simply going to let them and their supporters die and laugh my ass off.

Comments are closed.